WIZROBE: The Story Behind The Album Part 1

Wed, 12/02/2009 — Rev. Ragu

In 1989, Wizrobe released their most popular album to date, "Pussy Liquors & Fine Spirits." The album, widely known as a drastic departure from their EPIC FANTASY METAL roots, sent Wizrobe hurtling into the mainstream, the album eventually going triple platinum. Rather than the triumphal lyrics praising the deeds of the folkloric heroes of old and spinning fearful tales of the beasts that lurk on the edge of humanity's collective imagination, Wizrobe's new style was of the much more mainstream SEXY REACTION METAL (also must be capitalized). With the raunchy licks and erotically charged lyrics, Wizrobe found much wider appeal than merely blaring from parents' basements during all-night Dungeons & Dragons marathons.

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PHY 807 Quantum Mechanics Syllabus

Tue, 10/05/2004 — Fasteriskhead

Instructor: Prof. F. Asterisk (office hours 3:00-4:45 M W R)
Time and Place: TR 1:00-2:15, McKain 213.

Textbook: Quantum Physics: An Introduction to Mankind's Utter Annihilation by R. Ragu and N. Pete.

Schedule:
Aug. 17: Historical introduction. Units of measurement, wave-particle duality.
Aug. 19: Classical atomic models (Thompson et al). Atomic spectra, Rutherford scattering.
Aug. 24: Blackbody radiation, photoelectric effect, Short wavelength x-rays, more Rutherford. Light as particles.
Aug. 26: Compton effect, intro to De Broglie, particles as waves, death rays.
Aug. 31: Finish up death rays. Bohr model, correspondence principle, Wilson-Sommerfeld, Frank-Hertz, energy bands.
Sept. 2: De Broglie and particle as wave packet. Wave functions. Reevaluation of Bohr.
Sept. 7: Davisson-Germer, G.P. Thomson. Verification.
Sept. 9: Heisenberg: uncertainty, probability, expectation, deviation.
Sept. 14: The Schrodinger equation for the wave equation; separable solutions, the infinite well, replacing God with science.
Sept. 16: Experimentation and measurement.
Sept. 21: Operators, eigenfunctions, orthonormality, completeness, time dependency.
Sept. 23: Finish last class, methodology of mad cackling.
Sept. 28: Free particles, postulates of QM, bound state problems.

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A Dilemma

Mon, 08/16/2004 — Fasteriskhead

"Hey uhh, I guess none of you guys have seen like a time machine or maybe some kind of glowing portal or anything like that."

...

"But if you have seen something along those lines, or I guess maybe some kind of trickster-looking god type dude, then uhh, I'd like to know where, if it's no trouble or whatever. I mean it'd really help me out."

...

"Do any of you shitheads hablar inglés for fuck's sake? And uhh, christ dude quit staring at my crotch."

...That Suck Themselves And Also Each Other.

Fri, 08/13/2004 — Fasteriskhead

notes 8/14/04: final word came in today, they're shutting project down... committee must have finally heard the rumors, nothing else to be done. another six weeks & would have had a working model; i'd already determined that optimum piece of music for Rei had to be somewhere within recorded catalogue of phil "snakefinger" lithman, from there it was trial & error... too late now, career prob. over for good...

Rei was v. confused about all this, i actually broke down crying a little trying to explain it to her... later took her over to house from lab (no place for her to live right now), which was ok since wife left/took kids months ago. started drinking+talking a few hours back, somehow ended up in game of strip poker... have her down to bra & panties now, current objective is to remain smashed enough to keep from realizing what in god's name i'm doing & giving in to despair+overwhelming disgust w/self...

suicide = best option? will inquire about nonpainful methods tomorrow... poss. borrow one of steve's guns if shame = overwhelming & swiftness is needed...

...We're Developing Artificially Intelligent Cocks...

Sat, 07/17/2004 — Fasteriskhead

notes 7/16/04: was hopeful yesterday of a breakthru while introducing Rei to well-tuned piano, but things went horribly wrong the moment la monte reached magic harmonic rainforest chord and chain reaction could not be contained... Rei was returned from the medical ward 1 hr ago, we are keeping her on steady intake of thel. monk and nin to keep her stabilized but I fear damage to mind+body is too great...

...tomorrow has session of charlie daniels band/snakefinger scheduled but I will probably cancel (strain = too much?) and sub. something easier, poss. sabbath/cex/d. kennedys (early polyphony? leonin too risky)...

p.s. fucking amazon still has not shipped disgaea or splinter cell, wtf get with it shitheads (will call tomorrow as soon as I find fucking cust. service number)

Gene Studies Lead To Breakthrough

Tue, 07/13/2004 — Fasteriskhead

Anaheim, CA (AP) -- Scientists at the Trusteeship for the Investigation of Teel's Syndrome yesterday published a study announcing the discovery of a genetic variation that may account for more than 60% of known cases of the disease in question, more popularly known as "Invinco Fever." Teel's Syndrome has thousands of documented cases in America alone, and countless other victims all around the world have gone undiagnosed.

"We're talking about making a huge step forward in the treatment of a massively widespread medical crisis that has gone nearly unsung until very recently," said project leader Dr. Sak Ritmo at today's press conference. "If nothing else, we can now inform people of their condition beforehand and allow them to tell their families, 'Oh no, here comes Teel's Syndrome.' Though there's still no known cure for Invinco Fever, the fact that we can now identify high-risk cases not only gives us the chance to treat people much earlier, but we finally have a key for studying the disease in far greater depth."

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Here in the Lab...

Mon, 07/12/2004 — Fasteriskhead

notes 7/12/04: results not as expected... Rei responded more enthusiastically to schoenberg than webern, berio, or stockhausen, disproving initial calculations... tomorrow experiments begin again w/evaluation of original misfits, also sir mix-a-lot if time permits, but now entire future of project has been thrown into doubt...

also: owe sak $5 for lunch @ subway... sandwich was dry/rubbery and nasty, seriously fuck you subway

On Scientific Ethics

Mon, 07/12/2004 — Fasteriskhead

Ah, the paradox of science! Through our very efforts to better mankind, we have brought about things which may very well end the world as we know it. A double-edged sword indeed, and yet we press on, able to neither go backwards nor remain where we are. Indeed, for every child spared of smallpox, how many more have been mowed down by machine gun fire? For every mind set at ease by psychoanalysis and drug therapy, how many more have been driven to madness by the horrors of modern war or by the looming terror of nuclear annihilation?

I am on the verge of finding a key that will unlock the doors to cold fusion, free-roaming nanotechnology, and the cures for cancer and AIDS, and yet on the inside I feel cold, empty. Sooner or later what I've intended as a gift to the world will be perverted and turned against mankind for the benefit of a greedy few, and no one can ever put the genie back in the bottle. Will my work really make things any better? Will what I do, the discoveries I make on this day, truly help the world in any meaningful manner, or am I merely treating the symptoms and not the disease?


JESUS GOD FUCK

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