Sat, 07/24/2004 — Fasteriskhead
As I sit there in the dark at 4:00 a.m. staring at my moniter, a voice in the back of my mind proposes, "Hey!! Maybe if I can get my Ice Blaster here up to level 30, then my life can change for the better!" It grows more and more convincing with each passing moment. "The fact that I've flunked out of college and my entire family hates me and my parents refuse to give me any kind of recognition or aid won't matter! While women may look at me with a mixture of disgust and pity and right now I seem to be destined to a life of bitter loneliness without a hint of love or intimacy, all that is soon to change! Today I may be stuck in a shitty, go-nowhere job delivering stale inedible pizza, and when I return home I may look with a certain grim joy at the knife I've placed on the edge of the bathtub (in preperation for when I will finally escape this hell that is life), but NO MORE!" Yes, for with only a few missions further, Admiral Algor will reach the big three-oh; at last I will be the king of single-combat damage, and finally I can know of that elusive "joie de vivre." Women will flock to me and I will reach the fame and fortune of which I have always dreamed.
Time passes. Of course, when Admiral Algor does eventually turn over, none of it happens.
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